page one-
(Opener)
one panel.
They were young and they were lost.
But before something is lost. It is first found.
-
page 2-
three panel.
1- It began first as breath
2.and breath became water
3.and water (as it got weary of churning became earth)
(“You who laid the foundations of the earth
so that it should not be moved forever,
you covered it with the deep as with agarment,
the waters stood above the mountains.” (Ps. 104:5-6)
page 3-
one panel.
And of water and earth and spirit were born man and woman.
In matters grip but on spirits side.
Knowing full well that their essence was Breath. Ruh. Spirit. Swa. prana.
And everything contained that very essence within them.
'You are the salt of the earth and the light of the world'
((I'm still wondering whether my depiction should be Shiva-Shakti (androgynous)
or Adam Eve (two distinct beings)
or even just two children.
page 4.
2 panel.
1.
There were other forms too born of breath.. 4 legged creatures who inhabited earth,
winged creatures that soared in the sky.
creatures that lived in water.
and each lived for and with each other bonded by love.
a network of light.
2.
From Delight we came into existence.
In Delight we grow.
At the end of our journey’s close,
Into Delight we retire.
- Ashtavakra Gita 1: 18-20
all beings sang of this love and delight in a great cosmic orchestra.
Man's voice (then sweet) was too part of this song of praise.
page 5.
5.panel.
1.
one day men and women were distracted while singing. He saw something glimmering in the corner of his eye.
2.
It was a firefly.
3.
Man says: 'Light that is owned by something other than the stars'
4.
Having always lived by his need. this 'want' was new to him
5.
and then on. when all the creatures sang. his was not a song of love.
but a song of longing.
7 days and 7 nights later he saw Fire again. One day when all the world creatures were asleep, he snuck up behind the firefly and trapped it in a small glass box.
page6.
4 panels
1.
He labelled this box and it gave him great pleasure that he could see it whenever he wished and it would never ever go away (it had no choice).
2.
Soon he collected more creatures like this. He no longer sang in praise with the rest but instead arranged his collection meticulously in rows.
3.
When the other spirits approached him to ask him why he didn't sing and why he was trapping these creatures and plants he said
'Don't you see? I discovered them and so they are mine'
The spirits didn't understand this logic at all.
page 7.
one panel
But the truth is- that before any pandora's box was opened...it was first sealed up.
--------
-
-
The Nasha. - total change of mood+style.
page 8.
2 panel
1.
Man's greed led him to try and manipulate. Try and consume and control the spirit of the earth.
But above all, he was intoxicated.He was addicted to power. and it is this addiction, this intoxication and this blindness that gave birth to a dark powerful force with a life of its own
2.
'The Nasha'
page 9+10
1-6- horizontal- mans body with the nasha floating through it
It started as a small puff of smoke that enveloped his heart and wrapped its long vines around it. This gave him indifference.
It then spread to his chest that swelled up as his lungs were taken over by the Nasha. This gave him pride.
Next it spread to his throat and wound its vines around his neck nearly choking him. This gave him cold silence.
Then to his eyes. dilated pupils. Nasha swirling inside like dark pools of sorrow. This gave him blindness.
and having wrapped itself around every nerve and entered every stream that ran through man's body:
finally it penetrated his mind. This brought him death.
And not death of the spirit (for the spirit lives forever) or death of Love (because love exists beyond that) but the death of his compassion.
Which is the worst end of all.
panel count- 25 panels.
Treatment Note
minimalistic in line.
interesting use of textures + overlays and minimal colour.
Minimal text
maximum interpretative visual.
This visual on top is done for the 'children's book version of khoya. And wouldn't work as a comic because its too elaborate.
The visual below (left side is one possible way of rendering the comic.
it's an incomplete render though..
black and white version of the same.
I didn't want my frames to be too static. So even if you look at the storyboard- It's not within 'boxes'
I don't know if this is a good thing or a bad thing.
Also, do comix always have to be b+w? :|
This comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteIt's all good but i would just like to emphasise on the fact that minimalism is also extremely essential. What to not put in a frame is as important as what to put in one.
ReplyDeleteYour frames look good, but a little cluttered so there is hardly any breathing space which affects the story you are reading.
Think about it. The core for your story is good but the thumbnails aren't really doing justice to it. The story flows slowly and smoothly, let's say, like a river? And the thumbnails are rushing too fast.
I hope you get what i mean.
Also, i've noticed you tend to ignore your backgrounds and end up doing some digital layering for it.
I think you can do much more with lighting too.
Overall...good feel.
Also, there is a reason sometimes frames are used and not all the time the boxes are static. You can have a flow with the help of the boxes itself. You should try reading some graphic novels or some basic DC comics to understand this.
And i personally don't think comics need to be black and white. It can be whatever your story needs it to be and the way you want to say it. It completely depends on you. It's your baby.
Good Luck :)